Posts Tagged ‘Humour’

MacBook 1.1 (2007-), meet HP Compaq (2009-2013)... Oh, wipe that stupid smirk off your face, MacBook!

MacBook 1.1 (2007-), meet HP Compaq (2009-2013)… Oh, wipe that stupid smirk off your face, MacBook!

Earlier this month, I wrote that my HP Compaq kicked the bucket, likely due to loosened solder in one of the motherboard’s chips.

Well, a few weeks ago, I became alive again with a hand-me-down MacBook 1.1 from a very generous employer, whom I won’t flatter too much on the Internet. You know who you are and thank you so much.  It does the job for what I have to do in my day-to-day business and even makes things easier with MS Office and Adobe Creative Suite 4 installed. Lucky me, eh?

Anyhoo, when one replaces a laptop, there are some steps one may need to take to transfer files, troubleshoot bugs with apps and so on.

The list:

– Inform staff that I had a laptop again. This wounded soldier in the squad has been patched up and good to go again.

Progress: Done.

– Learn how to transfer files from a dead laptop’s hard disk to a… well… not-dead laptop.

Progress: Done. Did it all by myself with only a Philips screwdriver, 20 minutes of labour and 20 bucks spent! I’ve been introduced to gadgets called hard drive enclosures where you plug in a laptop hard disk and then it operates just like any other USB portable hard disk. Never knew these devices existed and am relieved that they do.

– Get Google Chrome and my printer working.

Progress: Need Snow Leopard (I have plain-vanilla Leopard). On its way from the Apple Store. This MacBook’s a bit of a cougar and is too old for Lion or Mountain Lion. Oh well, can’t be picky.

– Make a funny picture illustration with Creative Suite.

Progress: Done (see above). MacBook… why does he have to act so smug?

– Never write a blog post on my iPod Touch ever again.

Progress: Done and done. And I mean done!

– Now that I’ve switched to Mac, perpetuate the young, urban Mac-owner stereotype of bumming around by myself in an uptown coffee shop and write for an hour or two.

Progress: Out of character for this working-class suburbanite but I’ll do it once eventually.

– Repent for my sin of making that “found Jobs” joke in my last post.

Progress: Hmmm… nah. I’ve been interested in joining the Cult of Apple (partially, still prefer Android for mobile) for a while anyway. I guess Hell still awaits.

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The freelancer’s worst nightmare has happened to me: my laptop has died after four years of service.

It’s likely the motherboard and not the hard disk, which is a relief.

Still, being a web producer for publications, it’s a fairly harsh hit to have to take–I can only do so much with mobile apps.

Given my new no-nerd-box predicament, I had to immediately spring into action and do some more urgent items and think of other things for the near-future.

The list:

– Like a wounded soldier in the squad, take to the iPod Touch and my phone to inform editors of my dead laptop situation and direct urgent requests to my work partner, who owns a laptop that’s still very much alive and able.

Progress: Done.

– Tell said partner on the Internet that she’s my hero.

Progress: Done.

– Learn how recover files from a hard disk, transfer to new laptop, be grateful and relieved, take more-cautious backup steps, practice those steps for a while, get lazy again, repeat process in another half a decade.

Progress: Ongoing.

– Drink the Apple Kool-Aid and save for a MacBook. I’m liking reliable machines right now. You know how people in vulnerable points in their lives “find Jesus”? Well, I found Jobs.

Progress: Hell awaits for that joke.

– Realize that people might think I’m cheap, given that my dead laptop is an HP Compaq. Heck, now I worry if this makes me look undateable, even.

Progress: I have inner beauty.

– Use this computer-less downtime to read a book… a printed one. I bought one at Value Village the other day (guess I am cheap). It’s a humour memoir called Don’t Tell Mom I Work on the Rigs. She Thinks I’m a Piano Player in a Whorehouse. Appealing title for someone with a working-class upbringing like me.

Progress: One chapter in.

– Given I’m writing this on my iPod Touch, practice my touch-screen typing by cooking up another humour list like this one. “‘I drank my dog under the table,’ ‘Cops busted me for possession,’ ‘I ate too many shrooms’ and other excuses I’ve heard from construction workers for missing work” could stir up some laughs.

Progress: Never mind. Those are the only three good ones I can think of. Kind of a long title anyway.

– Be grateful once I get a new laptop and use it more to actually be a lot more productive and ease up on the procrastinating.

Progress:

A communicator just has to love a client who actually encourages wit and humour in copy writing projects. The president of a reputable renovations and home-building company in town is one such client of mine.

I’m grateful for the autonomy he entrusts me when it comes to digging up interesting info and feature ideas for his company’s quarterly external newsletter on anything reno-related, be it market data or even the issues that can taint industry’s reputation (ie. horror stories of contractors ripping people off).

Remember the Mayan “Apocalypse” last holiday season that came and went? Tinfoil sales skyrocketed for hat-making (kidding); reporters wouldn’t leave astronomers and the superstitious alone; and we made confessions on social networking (mine? I’ve never inhaled helium from a balloon to hear how funny my voice sounds). The Earth’s still here.

I couldn’t help but conclude the December newsletter’s “Did You Know?” section with something a little more fun after bombarding readers with Calgary Real Estate Board and StatsCan numbers.

Actual published copy below…

Did You Know?

Completely unrelated to our industry, but the Mayan calendar never factored in leap year days. Technically, this means that December 21st, 2012 on the Mayan calendar has already come and gone. Safe for us to say that this world will still be here for you to enjoy your finished [company] renovation in your home for many fruitful years to come. We can report that we did not renovate any doomsday shelters this year.

Source: International Business Times [citing NASA sources]

To this day, even though he wants that I be a bit funny, I still can’t believe my client was in on it.

Feel free to differ but I think that, as a company, a tastefully-written potshot at current water-cooler conversations give customers more to read about than just your bottom line and what you’re up to.

In the era of human (social) media, it’s good to show a little more of your human side.

Coming up in Part 2 later this morning: A few funny cell phone snapshots I’ve made while going about my work days in drywall finishing.